This year, I bring you something a little bit different...12 Holiday Excerpts and Flash Fiction!
Joshua Pantalleresco returns with another Christmas story...
I gotta be honest, I don't believe in you. I don't believe in much anymore to tell you the truth, but I need to talk to someone. Why not a fat man who makes toys?
I'm sorry. I'm just in a terrible place. I woke up in this incredibly dark time wondering what the hell I'm doing here. This isn't...this isn't what I imagined it to be. I wanted to be a writer, and have my books in bookstores. I'm on Amazon, without a bookstore in sight, spending Christmas alone, chasing my dreams. This isn't what it's supposed to be you know? I just can't get it together. I can't keep a job, with everything else, I'm stressed out. I have no idea what I'm doing, or where I'm going. I feel so alone right now. That's why I'm talking to you. I got nobody else.
I feel so betrayed. This wasn't what it was supposed to be you know?
I'd like a lot of things right now, but I don't think toys will help me. So, this Christmas, I just want to know it's all good and that it'll all work out.
I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. Don't worry about not believing in me. I'm used to it. I normally let these go unsaid, there's far too many of these letter this time of year. You sound like you need some help, so I'm here. Here's the bad news: I can't promise this is all going to work out. Life has no guarantees. It just doesn't. I'm just praying on the 24th I don't get stuck in that chimney on 224 Hastings. Yikes. Even I get no guarantees. I can't give any assurance on me breaking the plane on that chimney. I can't give you guarantees either, I'm afraid.
But you're not alone. People care about you. I care about you. It doesn't look like how you imagined it, I know, but there are people that would reach out and help you in a second. Use that. If you're uncomfortable, talk to a counselor, or a preacher, or someone who won't judge you. Most people forget how tough this time of year can be for people. I'm sorry you're going through this.
The good news? This won't last. Everything changes, from situations to belt sizes. You will get through this. You're still here. Only good can come from that. I promise. I know those words may be hollow right this minute, but if nothing else, take this. You're not alone, and people care. I care.